Living Hell - Volume #2, Issue #5


April 21, 2002

Special Tax Revolt, Er, Revolting Taxes Edition!


  o Mike and Julie's Virginia Adventure
  o Big Mike and the Bombers
  o Stranger Than Fiction
  o Movie Review
  o Osbournes
  o Ozzy #2

Mike and Julie's Virginia Adventure

Raleigh to Richmond to Charlottesville to Lynchburg and plenty o'
parts in-between:


Big Mike and the Bombers

Appearing nightly, at approximate three-year intervals:


Stranger Than Fiction

Yours Researching continues to unearth unusual items relating to
the Raleigh Fire Department.

Dig this gruesome fate...


> The News & Observer
> July 9, 1996
> Gasoline can blaze kills woman
> RALEIGH - Shirley Brantley told her husband she was going to mow
> the lawn. Moments later, flames ignited from a gas can engulfed
> and killed her in her yard Monday morning.
> Three passers-by tried to save her, but she died on the spot.
> Fire continued to spread outside of the small house, and the
> rescuers had to alert Brantley's husband inside.
> Fire officials are investigating whether the 49-year-old woman
> was smoking when she walked up to the can of gasoline.

Movie Review

PANIC ROOM is the tension-less trifecta of a Nana Mouskouri-looking
Jodie Foster in peril, visual wizards David Fincher (director) and
Darius Khondji (cinematographer), and the can't-miss premise of
wee-hour robbers battling wits with a single mom 'n' daughter se-
cluded in the fortified title object inside an otherwise unassuming
(if spectacularly roomy) Manhattan brownstone.

They want in, she wants out.

Think HOME ALONE by the way of Hitchcock as burglars and "burglees"
each try to outsmart the other.  Albeit with bunches of slow-motion
reaction shots and all-too-infrequent flashes of ingenuity, like an
errant propane tank plus standard length of garden hose used to li-
ven up the proceedings.

Regrettably, the baddies are never as menacing as the story sug-
gests-- such as Forrest Whitaker's lead invader who, we're told,
works for the home's security firm and should know *way* more about
ingression methods than demonstrated.

(The villains spend more time *bickering* than inventing, resulting
in a plodding pace that gives the viewer *way* too much opportunity
to think of solutions *themselves*.  At least it's *intellectually*

The second half is a bit peppier once roles are reversed and Mom's
on the outside and Dwight Yoakum gets his fingers crushed.  (The
film features several anatomical props, from Yoakum's afore-ampu-
tated digits to Foster's pregnancy-induced stunt breasts.  Got

And, like all of Fincher's features, the whole thing's blackly com-
ic.  Witness Foster's HOME ALONE-style short-circuiting of Whitak-
er's inflammable scare attempt.  (Where's a cursing Joe Pesci when
you need him?)

And Fincher's camera remains as artfully intrusive as ever, peek-
ing, poking, and peering in from every conceivable angle.

Even all the way inside a flashlight bulb.



Are *you* watching?

Here's your episode guide, complete with weekly "vulgarity counts:"


F***, man

Ozzy #2

Which Osbourne are your?  Hilarious self-test:


I love you all.

Copyright 2002 by Michael J. Legeros




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